Use This Template to Resolve Confusing Feelings! Not Today Blog 49
Not me, lying in bed on a Sunday night, responding to a friend’s message with “Don’t worry, it wasn’t urgent. Sure, let’s have a phone call next week instead.” I do most of my lying when I’m trying to go to bed anyway, haha. Here is a way I have discovered to deal with confusing feelings when I (think I) have no one to talk to. All you need is a journal.
The Right Person to Talk To
Most of us have family and close friends to turn to when we need to talk.
I am not an overthinker. But there are situations when I tell myself that the number of people, I could share my feelings with is limited. “She would worry too much, he wouldn’t understand, they would feel forced to form an opinion when all I need is someone to listen to me…”
Especially, when I don’t really know what to feel.
Journaling helps. Writing things down gives me a better perspective. I can do it by myself. It often helps me understand the situation, which is crucial to finding solutions or healing.
Every phenomenon experienced fully from the beginning to the end produces wisdom.
David Hans-Barker
A Journaling Template to Get Clarity on Confusing Feelings
In the past, I would open a double-page spread in my journal and start writing. I did not follow a structure. Don’t get me wrong, just the process of writing things down helps. But this Sunday I created a template that seems to work for me and hopefully for you too.
Here is what I do.
Step 1: Summarise the situation handwritten in your journal.
(This is your sign to buy a simple journal and put it on your nightstand.)
Don’t use names.
By leaving out names, I am less attached to my memory. It makes it easier to dive into my thoughts without having my emotions distract me too much from the facts.
Step 2: Write a conclusion by following this template.
I accept that I feel … (Describe the feeling that the situation evoked in you. Keep it short and clear.)
But I decide that it will not affect … (Describe a condition/relationship/event that you don’t want to be affected by the situation. Be specific.)
I decide to be honest about my feelings.
What happens happens. This will not affect my long-term happiness.
Read your conclusion aloud a few times.
Re-read in the morning.
Why Not Today?
Once a person is determined to help themselves, there is nothing that can stop them.
Nelson Mandela
Writing is a huge tool for me to process thoughts and feelings. That is one of the main reasons why I have been able to keep this blog going for 49 posts!
Have you been dealing with things lately?
Consider writing them down. Go to bed a little earlier, get out your notebook and put your thoughts on paper. Whatever it is you’re thinking about. Chances are that no one will read them if you don’t want people to.
D
