Safe Spaces: Why He Needs 30 Minutes on The Toilet! Not Today Blog 33

Sometimes I wish the taxi ride would never end. It has just become my safe space.

Wishing For A Traffic Jam

8am, Seminyak, Bali. I have been awake for 5 hours to get from Jakarta to Bali. I am about to meet an old friend at the hotel I booked for us last night.

We haven’t seen each other for ages. Soon we will talk about everything that has happened in our lives since then. The longer I sat in this taxi, the more comfortable it became. I am clearly nervous and wish this taxi ride would go on for another 10 minutes. What have I even done in the last year? How are we going to get along? I just need 10 more minutes, come on Bali traffic do your thing.

Restroom Refuge

Have you ever wondered why your friend, partner, teammate takes ages on the toilet?

Five minutes
Ten minutes
Fifteen minutes
"Danny, what are you doing in there for so long?"

It’s usually not what I’m doing. It’s what I’m not doing.

We live busy lives. Sometimes it is hard to escape. We are surrounded by people and noise. Distracted. I often struggle to get a thought together. It could be my ADHD (which I’m not sure I have) or just the fact that I need a few minutes to myself.

The toilet is one place I can get that. 10 minutes of just me. It’s not comfortable, nor does it take me 10 minutes to wipe my ass. But think about it, why has crying in the school toilet been a thing for generations.

No one is watching you, no judgement, no shouting. Only you.

Within you, there is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat at any time and be yourself.

Hermann Hesse

Find Your Safe Space

Being by myself for a few minutes each day has been crucial for my sanity.

The next time your friend takes forever in the toilet – if you can wait, leave them alone. And I don’t know if I’m the only one, but when I’m sitting on the toilet, please don’t start a conversation through the closed door. I consider that an invasion of privacy, haha! Most of the time I won’t even bother to answer.

Alone doesn’t mean lonely.

Why Not Today

Live can be a lot sometimes. I think everybody should allow themselves a bit of alone time.

Why not today take 10 minutes out of the day, sit by yourself and breathe. Lie on the ground and look at the ceiling. Find an empty bench in the park away from all distractions and just be.

D