He Broke His Leg! Not Today Blog 12

It took me fucking forty minutes to admit him to the hospital to treat his leg. I can’t explain how lucky we both were that day.

My Accident

Two weeks ago, I had a bad car accident. I was waiting at the centre strip to make a U-turn crossing a bus lane. A motorbike came from the side crashing into my standing car, smashing the driver’s door.

My airbag opened, the motorbike went flying and the rider went to the ground. The bang was so loud that my first thought was that he had died.

Within seconds people were stopping their scooters to help the guy while I was trying to get out of my car.  That’s the Indonesia I fell in love with during the past three years. People help. Everything was so fast. I was outside of the car 30 seconds after the crash. Meanwhile, 3 men were taking off the guys helmet.

I Was The Ambulance

He was shaking for another 30 seconds as if he was having a seizure. As soon as his body got back to normal breathing, one man started shouting at me to open the door to the back seats in my car. It took another minute until he was lying in my car. I climbed back into the car and turned on the ignition. Men pointing me in the direction of the next hospital.

As if we had practised this situation before I was driving down the road within minutes after the crash. I was searching for a hospital in a smashed car with a bleeding guy on my backseat. I was too scared to stop to turn on my Google Maps because I did not know if I would lose him if I wasted time. 

Got Rejected At The First Hospital

Ten minutes into the ride I realised that he was conscious and his adrenaline levels were going back to normal. He started feeling pain. He screamed. Knowing that he was responsive kept me calm. I arrived at the hospital and they rejected us. “No emergency! Go to Siloam Hospital.”

I had no choice but to go to the next hospital. This time I started my navigation. Luckily, I knew that my mother, who can speak Bahasa Indonesia fluently, was down the road at the bank. I called her to immediately leave and wait for me outside.

We had to stop a couple of times to reposition his left leg. I knew it was broken. His upper leg had no stability.

It took us fucking forty minutes to get to the hospital. Jakarta traffic is a nightmare. Waiting for an ambulance would have taken too long. I helped the nurses to carry him out of the car. I was carrying the broken leg. My hands were right on the two pieces of a broken bone.

All the way to the hospital he apologised that he cut me off. In Indonesia, you are not allowed to drive in bus lanes other than for turns.

What a day.

Yeah I’m Fine

That same day I told everybody about the crash and everybody assured me that it was not my fault. I stayed pretty calm all day. 

The next day was terrible. Every banging noise made me flinch. I could not stop thinking about his broken leg and I had flashbacks of the split second before the crash. My mind kept revisiting this moment and exchanged the motorbike with a bus crashing in my door.

I was ok for the next few days but thoughts came up all the time. Could I have spotted him if I had waited longer to go for the turn? I wasn’t sad, or scared of traffic or angry. Still, memories came back all the time.

One Conversation Changes Everything

It wasn’t until my friend Vivi sent me a voice message about five days later when I realised that even if I did not feel sad or angry, I did feel confused.

“Hey Danny, sorry that I contact you only now. I did not take the time to talk to you, to find out how you are after your accident. If you can sleep well, if you are blaming yourself? I just wanted to say sorry that I did not talk to you earlier. Are you free for a call this week?”

We talked that same day and this one phone call changed everything. I told her my thoughts from the past few days. She didn’t tell me anything new. I knew that I could not change what happened and I knew I had the chance to use this situation and make something good out of it. But it felt just so good to hear from somebody else that how I reacted to driving him to the hospital was brave and that sometimes things just happen.

“It’s not what happens to you but how you react to it that matters.”

Epictetus

Why Not Today

Since that phone call, my flashbacks to that moment became less and if they come then without that uncomfortable feeling that I did something wrong.

I’ve said it before and I say it again. Make sure your friends are okay. One phone call can change everything. You don’t need to have the answers. Often it is enough to just be there.

Call somebody today. Yes. Why not today.

Oh and wear a fucking helmet. The biker was wearing a full-face helmet. The only scratches on his helmet were in his chin area. He basically crashed into a wall headfirst. (He had a laceration on his jaw from the helmet. Still better than crashing with your face directly into the car.)

I see far too many people in Jakarta and the rest of Indonesia not wearing helmets. Families, where mother and father are wearing helmets but the child sitting on mum’s lap on the scooter, is not wearing a helmet. How can people accept responsibility for this?

I am thinking about buying a bunch of helmets and giving them away for free to people. I have been thinking about doing this for years. Maybe this was my wake-up call to do it.

The guy had to go into surgery for his broken leg. He has enough money to cover his medical treatment. Other than that he is doing okay.

D

Thanks Mon for your help on this one.