27 Lessons from My First 27 Years on The Planet! Not Today Blog 43
My fear of getting older has vanished over the past two years. I’m 27 years old and feel that things have just become interesting. As if the first quarter-century had been a journey to the starting line.
Since I moved to Indonesia five years ago, I’ve spent a fair amount of time getting to know myself. I know it’s a work in progress, but I’ve realised that life on this planet isn’t so bad. There are endless things to do and almost nothing you can’t do if you just tried.
I took the time to write down random bits of advice, lessons and observations from my time on the planet and cut them down to my top 27.
27 years may not amount to much life experience but it’s a start. Here’s what I came up with.
1. Stay with beer.
First things first. I know schnapps is great. Who doesn’t love the taste of vodka or tequila-based long drink? But trust me stay with beer.
“Yeah, Danny, but beer makes my stomach bloat.”
Exactly, use that! That’s your ticket to getting less drunk and fewer headaches.
Oh, btw Vitamin B Complex before a night out helps against blackouts.
Take it from someone who has already woken up in the hospital the morning after.
2. Mute.
Mute your phone, WhatsApp groups, Instagram stories, app notifications.
You don’t need to be available 24/7.
If muting someone on social media helps you feel better, do it. Make your mental health a priority. Yes, they may be good friends of yours, but you can always look at their profile later and check if you’ve missed anything important. Chances are you haven’t. Comparison really can be the thief of joy.
3. Removing yourself from the situation is an option.
In 2015, I left my hometown to go backpacking for a year and then decided to move to Indonesia. Only by removing myself could I break patterns and routines and really get to know me.
4. Let them be sad.
You don’t need to cheer them up. Show them that you’re there for them no matter if they’re happy or not. Show them that it’s ok to feel.
Here is an overview of things you could say to show validation and hope instead of asking the other person to just be happy.
5. Listen.
Listen to what they’re saying, not what you want to hear.
Get rid of your presumptions. Drop the old story.
6. It’s all about the basics.
Learn to do them well. And do them often.
Get stronger in the five basic exercises in the gym (squat, deadlift, bench press, barbell row, and overhead press). They cover most muscles of your body.
Work on the structure and clarity of your website, worry about cool animations later.
Shoot great static video footage, worry about moving shots later.
7. Run on your midfoot or forefoot.
If you’re running a lot this one could save you a lot of knee and hip pain. However, it comes at the price of having sore calves for a month. They will eventually adjust.
8. “Hey, what’s your name?”
It’s all you need to meet people.
9. Wish them a happy birthday on Facebook, Linkedin, etc.
Yes, even if you haven’t spoken to them for years. Make them feel good, make them feel noticed.
10. (Re-)Learn to sit on the floor.
A lost skill that is surprisingly important. Comes in handy in Asian restaurants, when playing with children or even when sitting on a paddleboard.
Crucial for your next Vipassana course.
11. Less is more.
I lived out of a backpack for a year. Now I live off two racks of clothes. I wear one of 6 polo shirts and one of three pairs of pants to work every day. I never have to think about what to wear.
Keep your emails, blog posts and articles short. Cut out unnecessary words. A “very” adds little to the sentence, changing the word from “tired” to “drained” does.
12. Measure twice cut once.
Again, measure twice cut once.
13. To start, start.
This contradicts my last point to some extent. But it also doesn’t. Planning is important. Action is important too.
If blind planning gets in the way of action, start and adjust later.
I somehow figured out how to create this okay-looking website and how to publish post blog posts, even though I know nothing about HTML. You’ll find a way to figure things out. Just start!
First you set sails then you adjust them; not the other way around.
Not Today Blog
14. To learn a new language, work for six months on a construction site in a country where the language is spoken.
I took a 6-week language course to learn Bahasa Indonesia. It helped, although I still couldn’t follow conversations between locals.
Over the following months, I forgot most of it. English was the easier option.
Then I moved to a construction site to finish a project. It lasted six months. No one there spoke English. I was forced to communicate via Google Translate. I got the hang of it pretty quickly.
You will learn to develop simple sentence structures that work. Then you just insert vocabulary.
Welding = Di las.
When? = Kapan?
Not yet = Belum.
Faster = Lebih cepat.
15. Foam roll.
The more it hurts, the better it probably is.
A foam roller is cheap. There are lots of instructions on the internet on how to roll out your muscles properly.
When I have knee pain, I look up how the muscles run towards and away from the knee. I roll out the whole strand of muscles extensively, putting more and more weight on the roller. I stop at spots where it hurts and roll in short movements until I can lean my body weight on that spot without screaming. Works a treat.
16. Master one magic trick.
I hate to give it away, but that’s how I get new people to like me, haha!
If you spend time in hostels, you’ll eventually learn how to play Shithead. It’s the only card game you’ll ever need.
After a few rounds, when I notice that concentration is slipping and people want to take a break, I start with “Did you know I’m a magician?”
Really, all I do is re-enact this card trick that Chris Pratt presented on the Graham Norton Show.
I’m not going to tell you how the trick works though! I’m a magician I never give away my tricks. (It’s the third suggested video…)
17. There’s always a human on the other end.
Think about how you phrase things. If that’s an email or a call with customer support.
18. Accept help, accept gifts, accept compliments.
Helping others or making them smile is the fastest way to feel happy for me. However temporary it may be.
Why not let others feel happy too? Say thank you and let them do their thing.
And when you help others and they say thank you, say “You’re welcome” instead of “No problem”. Accept the fact that you have taken the time to help someone. That’s worth something.
19. Read.
Or listen to audiobooks.
Read a wide range of books. Things tend to repeat themselves over and over again. Read both old and new books. Most importantly, read books you enjoy.
And bookmark the shit out of your books. Bookmarking helps your brain process information more effectively.
20. Note the “do’s” (not the don’ts).
Parents tell their kids to not do things. Kids go on to do the things.
Our brains tend to focus on what comes after the “don’t”.
“Please don’t sit here.”
“Please don’t touch items unless buying.”
Instead, focus on the do’s. Bookmark sentences with positive wording, rewrite statements with negative wording.
The German rapper Samy Deluxe said in 2009:
I am not fighting AGAINST racism, egoism, terrorism Hate only produces hate, I'm fighting FOR something A better country, a better world Sounds kind of corny but it's still important somehow
21. Travel.
My goal in life is to see things as they really are. To be fully aware. Away from the stories, away from the autopilot.
Visiting places you’ve heard (positive or negative things) about, or seen documentaries about, is a good way to learn about the discrepancy between information and experience.
Travel far if you can, but definitely to places that are close by. Go where people go and where people don’t go.
22. Age is reversive.
I don’t know what it is, but old people behave like children.
Which is great but also annoying haha!
23. Don’t send or ask for nudes (before the first date).
Do I want to elaborate on this? Haha
Actually, a friend told me.
24. Learn to be with yourself.
I spent a lot of time alone and I was able to work through shit that I didn’t know was there.
Being alone does not have to mean lonely.
25. Breathwork is the quick fix. Meditation is the long-term fix.
Breathwork and meditation are incredible tools to overcome mental challenges and improve awareness. Although there are many different techniques, for me the simplest ones have been the most impactful.
I have spent many hours of my life practising Anapana meditation. Just noticing the breath in and around your nose for an extended period of time can be so powerful – if done consistently.
20 minutes ++ each morning have helped to improve my mental health greatly.
When I notice stress and the need to calm down, I go to a quiet place, lie down on the floor and do a breathing exercise. Most of the time I would do the 10-20-30 breathing. A simple technique to instantly reset your system.
26. Get into a position where you must make decisions and therefore will eventually make mistakes. And then make all of them.
I have been fortunate to be involved in many decision-making roles over the years. Be it related to cash flow, projects or HR.
Yes, I have caused a lot of damage, but I have also been part of success stories. All this has helped me to learn and gain confidence. I think it’s fear that I was able to let go of.
27. Challenge yourself.
Enrol for that course, book that trip, sign up for that race, start that painting.
Why not today? Why not you?
D
